I was thinking about how stressful this year has been.
It has been a weird stressful year, hasn’t it?!
And we aren’t through it yet. And, of course, winter is coming—which could mean more weirdness and more stress. I have no doubt that’s exactly what it will mean.
So I’ve been trying to get my bearings a bit. I have discovered that as I take a breath to get my bearings, I actually grow more patient with the people around me, particularly my husband.
This is a good thing—this patience—because he’s the guy with whom I get to do life and have sex. If ever there was a time we need to be nurturing our sexual intimacy, I’m convinced it is this year! Let me tell you, this year has done everything it can to sabotage our sexual intimacy, and I have had just about enough of that kind of sabotage.
We do better when we have sex. I feel stronger when he and I make love. It feels like one of the few things we actually have a say in. Well, that and our attitude. We definitely have a say in our attitude, too, which brings me back to this concept of getting my bearings.
Breathing. Trusting. Believing this year will not do us in, no matter how hard it seems bent on doing exactly that.
I’m even beginning to feel these are pinnacle moments before us. What are we going to do in the face of mounting stress and uncertainty? Who are our people—the ones who are in the journey with us?
It’s good to have a tribe. So good and healthy and right to have a tribe.
It’s even better if your spouse is part of that tribe. One of your people. One of your safe confidantes. One of the havens into which you lean—and lean hard—when the ground is shifty and unpredictable, but you have to stand your ground nonetheless. You have to wake up each morning and do life there.
So I am humbly encouraging you to take a breath and get your bearings. As one weary journeyer to another, I hope you will take a breath with me and get your bearings.
I hope your spouse does, too.
And, of course, I hope the two of you find solace and strength when you make love.
If ever there was a year giving us all the prompts we need to get our bearings and gain perspective on what matters most, it is this year.
Copyright 2020, Julie Sibert. Intimacy in Marriage Blog. Links may be monetized.