Do You Struggle Seeing Your Husband’s Penis as Attractive?


positive-outlook-on-husbandI debated going with that headline. It could be quite misleading if you don’t read to the end.

“Do you struggle seeing your husband’s penis…”

That is slightly better than the first headline I wrote, which was, “Do You Struggle Finding Your Husband’s Penis Attractive?” Again, if you don’t read to the end, you may think this is a post about penis size. “Do you struggle finding your husband’s penis…”

What can I say? As a young journalist back in the day, it was drilled into me that headlines matter. Clearly some lessons never leave a person. Writers also cannot help but notice mistakes on billboards. “You had six words to get right! Six. Words.”

Anyway. I digress. This isn’t a post about penis size. Or headline writing, for that matter.

I was thinking about how some wives consider the penis gross rather than beautiful or stunning. Most husbands do not have the same struggle with their wife’s vagina, and certainly not with her breasts.

Generally speaking, husbands tend to be enamored with their wife’s vagina and breasts. But as for a wife’s impression of the penis? The sentiment can be more of begrudging tolerance rather than eager enthusiasm. 

Not surprisingly, having a negative perspective of how the penis and the testicles look can diminish the overall perspective a wife may have about sex. Seeing the penis as gross may become synonymous with seeing sex as gross.

To many wives’ credit, the difficulty in embracing a positive view of the penis isn’t always insensitive or malicious. It can just be a lot to take in (figuratively and literally). A wife may feel hesitant to know what to do.

Yet nurturing and enjoying sex in a marriage necessitates moving beyond first impressions and awkwardness. If a wife is to savor, pursue and hold sex in high value, she must think of the penis as more than something to simply passively receive.

Who is with me on this? Do you want to be a sex-positive wife? If so, share in the responsibility and privilege of the mutuality of sex. In other words, gals, it can’t be all about him taking the lead and driving the sexual tone. You too have that opportunity. Husbands, you certainly can help in that direction by having good hygiene and coming to bed clean.

As wives, we do our marriage a world of good by getting over any hang-ups or negative perceptions we may have about our husband’s penis.

I know some women probably think I’m crazy for saying this, but I totally think it’s possible to see a husband’s penis as stunning and worthy of attention. It is not something gross. It is a part of your husband. And just as he shouldn’t be embarrassed or ashamed of it, neither should a wife be embarrassed to enjoy it and to revel in bringing him sexual pleasure in the way she touches it.

The book of Song of Songs in the Old Testament is so visual. Yes, lots of metaphors and allegories, but there’s no doubt this husband and wife think quite fondly of each other’s bodies.

Imagine what it would do for marriages everywhere if husbands and wives would be eager, enthusiastic and complimentary about each other’s bodies?!!

Do you struggle seeing your husband’s penis as attractive? As one wife to another, I encourage you to not settle in with your disdain. Don’t get comfortable or rationalize that your less-than-stellar perspective is okay. Don’t justify it by saying that other women think of penises as disgusting. 

We don’t have to get “I Am a Penis-Positive Wife” t-shirts. (Although, that would be quite the conversation starter, wouldn’t it?!)

Do you struggle seeing your husband’s penis as attractive? If so, what are you going to do to improve your perspective?

For more reading, you can cruise through my list of past posts, as well as my page with a bunch of posts on orgasm.

Copyright 2020, Julie Sibert. Intimacy in Marriage Blog. Links may be monetized.

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7 thoughts on “Do You Struggle Seeing Your Husband’s Penis as Attractive?

  1. Troy says:

    Wives, if your man needs some help in the manscaping areas, why not lend him a hand. And vice versa fellas. Go from welcome to the jungle to smooth operator. 😉

  2. Dawnna Davis says:

    I don’t find my husband’s penis attractive. It’s been a tough issue in our marriage. I thought I could get away with not paying any attention to it orally. I don’t even really like touching it.
    One day he asked me why I never showed any interest in his penis and I told him the truth. He said knowing the truth helped because he had been telling himself all sorts of stories about why I never went there. I like it inside me and that’s about it. He said he thought he was ugly. Or not a good size. It really got to him.
    We are still picking up the pieces from it.

  3. J. Parker says:

    Thank you! I had been wondering what to get you for Christmas 2020, but I’m ordering your “I’m a Penis-Positive Wife” t-shirt today! 😉

    (I’m a PPW too myself.)

  4. Rachel says:

    That is funny J. Parker, ha ha …….A penis positive T- shirt.

    I never really thought too much about his penis being attractive or not unless he has an erection. I think my husband`s erect penis is attractive for sure.

  5. Linda says:

    Nope, not at all. Sometimes, I find myself just admiring it. I’m not thinking any thoughts about it. I just like looking at it. We seldom close our Master Bath door and we have a large, open shower. Some mornings when I actually awake early enough, I enjoy getting glimpses of his penis as he showers. I’m sure to wake up early tomorrow morning, now that you have me thinking about it. 🙂

  6. WK says:

    My wife is so modest that I rarely see much of her. I know she’s very conscious of her chest after a double mastectomy along with varicose legs. As a result, she dresses like an Eskimo.

    The only mention of my penis was “ are you ready”? when we did have sex years ago ( been sexless all 44 years with NO sex the last 14). Oral sex was horribly out of the question and I couldn’t even get her to touch my member. Sex was a real nuisance to her, always performed out of duty. All I wanted was a normal sex life but got nothing except disappointment!

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