Some people wonder what it’s like on a day-in day-out basis for me to speak and blog about sexual intimacy in marriage.
I thought I would give you a behind-the-scenes look at a few things that may (or may not?!) surprise you.
3 Glimpses of Life as a Christian Sex Blogger
1. My life is a lot like everyone else’s
I think some people have a romanticized view of my life, as if my husband and I are having hot passionate sex every day and basking in the glow of ravenous love.
I do love the guy. No doubt about that. But our life is overflowing with the same mundane responsibilities and challenges that most people juggle. We have one kid in college and one in high school, so clearly that all involves a fair amount of details and check writing and parental guidance. Some days we hope we are getting it right. Many days we are clearly falling down on the job. Just ask our kids.
And we have extended family responsibilities and challenges, just like a lot of you do. Managing boundaries and ups and downs with extended family can feel like a full-time job. It’s always something. A good friend and I ruminate about some of our extended family challenges, and she and I both just shake our heads and say “I can’t even” to express our level of disbelief.
My desk and email in-box pile up. Things in our house break. Everyone still wants clean laundry and milk and some indication that there is a captain at the helm keeping this thing afloat. If we could all go back and tell our 17-year-old selves about the amount of adulting up ahead, would we?! Probably not.
Just like you, our calendar at times feels cumbersome. The dog throws up every now and then. We haven’t seemed to figure out how to have enough room in our recycling bin for all we want to recycle.
And more than I care to admit, I don’t know what’s for dinner.
And just like many of you, our sexual intimacy wanes and gets ignored and then gets attention and then gets ignored again.
It’s not all heart emojis and eggplant emojis for the sex blogger. Just keeping it real.
2. A fair amount of administration goes into being a speaker and writer
I have a million ideas. It’s true. Well. Just short of a million.
But occasionally the wifi goes out. Or I have to weed through spammy comments about how to get a Russian bride or comments from people who get ultra graphic in what they write and then wonder why I don’t hit “approve.”
Like most speakers and writers, I would love to spend all my work time speaking and writing. I have so many ideas I want to flesh out (Literally and figuratively. Not gonna lie). But the administrative side of things sometimes saps my creative time and inspiration. The technical difficulties. The paperwork. The paralysis of “what should I do next?!”
Some days I want to avoid everything and just curl up with a cup of coffee, blanket and good book. But if the wifi is out, I need to deal with that. Because in today’s world, a writer and speaker can’t get much done with spotty wifi. In today’s world, no one can get much done with spotty wifi.
3. I never want to lose my voice
Well, of course, physically I never want to lose my voice. But that’s not what I’m talking about. It may surprise you that I sometimes struggle with the right way to say something.
As a Christian, obviously my heart’s desire is to honor the Lord in the way I speak about sex and marriage. At the same time, I don’t want to over-spiritualize things or make it sound like Christians don’t face many of the exact same struggles that non-believers face in their relationships.
I want to be authentically me and offer my voice. I want to acknowledge the Lord’s provision and vision for marriage and sex and, at the same time, acknowledge the messiness and difficulties of marriage—no matter how much we love and serve the Lord.
And I know I don’t always get it right. There are times I probably over-spiritualize and there are times I probably don’t bring God into my writing and speaking enough. The struggle is real, my friends.
So there you have it. Three glimpses into my life as a Christian sex blogger.
Of course, nothing has convinced me to throw in the towel on writing and speaking on sex, so if you’ve hung with me this long—or if you just discovered my blog—I encourage you to keep stopping by. I can’t promise it won’t be messy, but I can promise I will keep sharing… assuming the wifi is working, that is.
Copyright 2020, Julie Sibert. Intimacy in Marriage Blog. Links may be monetized.