sexual struggles, Uncategorized
Will the Sexy New Viagra Commercial Help More Marriages?
There I was, just enjoying some post-season major league baseball, and what pops on my TV screen?
A sexy viagra commercial.
Have you seen it?
(I would show it here, but it is a little risqué — not by today’s TV standards, but by the standards I’m trying to maintain on my site.)
It’s not that some fresh approaches aren’t needed in erectile dysfunction advertising.
I mean, who of us hasn’t grown weary of the “two bathtubs on a hill” approach (which, I might add, never has made any sense to me. Yeah, I know, that’s a commercial for Cialas — not Viagra — but in general, all the ED ads have a similar awkward feel to them. Remember the football through the tire swing and getting “back in the game”?)
Anyway. I digress.
Viagra marketing gurus dove headlong down a different path, diverging from the doctorly male voiceover that is so often the main player in ads for erectile dysfunction drugs.
And there’s no squeaky-clean middle-aged American couple, playfully bantering and affectionately giving each other “that look” while he does something really manly like fix a light fixture.
The new commercial offers instead an alluring middle-aged woman, sprawled across a bed in a cabana overlooking the ocean (because that’s where most everyday people make love on a regular basis. Any.Way.)
Seductively she paints the picture for you men in your 40s and beyond, reassures you that “lots of guys” deal with this sort of thing (true) and then tugs you close with a dash of hope by saying, “If ED is stopping what you started, ask your doctor about Viagra.”
(Voiceover dude does show up near the end, because he has to warn you about those 4-hour erections, but for the most part, this commercial is all about sexy cabana girl).
When I first saw it, I immediately thought the goal was to try to arouse the male viewer with her visual appeal and Australian accent, in hopes that the viewer’s penis won’t get firm while watching — and he will think to himself, “Sexy cabana lady is way better than doctorly male voiceover guy, but obviously I still need a little help here.”
Yup. That’s where my mind was going.
I think, though, what the marketing gurus are mostly going for is the reassurance part.
Attractive woman seems to reach right through the TV, as if she is having a personal conversation with middle-aged guy. She tenderly reminds him that his erectile dysfunction is not the end of the world. He can still get back in the game. And he doesn’t have to throw a football through a tire swing to do it.
While I am not crazy about seductive advertising, I am glad that we as a society are becoming more comfortable talking about and addressing what is a genuine issue for many married couples.
When couples become open and informed about erectile dysfunction and seeking solutions that may help, they do their marriage a world of good.
There is too much at stake to simply ignore the struggle.
For one, silence can become a breeding ground for misinterpretation and thoughts that damage a relationship, not strengthen it. A wife may think her husband is not attracted to her and aroused by her. A husband may think his manhood is jeopardized by his inability to get an erection, so he decides to stop initiating all together.
Vicious, vicious cycle that can be so destructive.
God works in the light. If erectile dysfunction is affecting your marriage, walk in the direction of shedding light by discussing it — with each other and with your doctor.
There may be options that you thought you would never need, but that are actually ideal to help nurture your sexual connection.
I remember years ago speaking to a women’s group about sexual intimacy in marriage. Afterward, a woman who was probably in her 60s came up to me and shared that she and her husband had struggled with erectile dysfunction. She said he was apologetic the first time it happened (and slightly embarrassed), but that it was a great opportunity for her to show him love and reassure him.
Their willingness to talk about it drew them together. Had they taken a different approach and gone silent or started avoiding intimacy all together, the toll on their marriage would have been painful.
Viagra’s sexy cabana gal maybe has a good point. If erectile dysfunction is stopping what you started, talk to your doctor.
And even if erectile dysfunction drugs or other medical approaches aren’t the right answer for you, be courageous in not letting erectile dysfunction destroy your physical intimacy in your marriage.
There are still many ways to show sexual physical affection and strengthen your intimate connection. Your marriage is worth it.
Copyright 2014, Julie Sibert. Intimacy in Marriage Blog.
While I’m not all for sexy commercials, I’m like you and have never understood those Cialis/Viagra commercials where the man is working late at the office or pulling a horse trailer out of the mud and there is no woman in the picture whatsoever, except at the end where they are in two separate bathtubs holding hands. LOL
“There are still many ways to show sexual physical affection and strengthen your intimate connection.”
Julie, what if your marriage bed is limited by your spouse to only sexual intercourse? Spouse says oral sex is gross. No way anal will be allowed (I agree). Manual stimulation is allowed as foreplay to intercourse.
Whenever I see those commercials, I just laugh. Not because I think I won’t need it in 10 or 15 years, but because it won’t matter anyway – we’re sexless now, and have been for 20 years, so why would it change where I would need it? At least the big pharma companies won’t get my money.
Great Blog, Julie!!! Have personally been in that vicious cycle of miscommunication in the past where I felt rejected by my husband and had no idea what was going on because he wouldn’t communicate with me. Communication is so vital!
I about threw the remote at the twit to get her off the TV. 1. I’m watching a baseball game and this condescending British bimbo proceeds to tell me that “it’s ok. It happens to everyone”. That may be, and it may happen to me at times, but I sure don’t need her pity. She’s arrogant and quite frankly a turn off, so I switch the channel because I don’t want to hear that from her. She is having too much fun telling men that their peckers are broken and ain’t that a shame. It would be like Brad Pitt telling my wife that vaginal dryness is “ok”. It just doesn’t sit well with me to be talked down to in that way.
I agree with you Julie. The more I watched the ad the more I liked it. Men in their 60s will, sooner or later, deal with this issue. The ad is pleasant. She makes you feel comfortable that you will always be able to have an intimate love relationship. I hated the goofy “men around the house”, cowboys, and big truck ads. The “man around the house” makes men look old and weakening and very Beta.