Intimacy in Marriage

Encouraging Christian Women toward Healthy Sexual Intimacy

5 Reasons I Like Sex: Confessions From a Christian Wife

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Well, there are a lot more than 5 reasons, but its debatable how much you really want to know about me, so I'll hold off at 5.

As a Christian wife, I do like sex.  To some of you reading this, such a proclamation makes me either an annoying freak or a bewildering mystery.

Can you hear the theologians murmuring... "Hmmm... We were busy studying discipleship when we stumbled across something that rarely is found in its natural habitat. A Christian wife. Who likes sex. Fascinating."

So, just in case you were wondering, here are 5 reasons I like sex...

1. It tells Satan to get his hands off my marriage.

When I hear about couples who are having little or no sex, I get a wee bit jittery.  I mean, not in an obvious way, but I think to myself, "That's a sure fire way to pin a target on your marriage."

The Enemy is indeed "prowling around looking for someone to devour." From where Satan is standing, a marriage where one or both spouses is indifferent about sex makes for a scrumptious snack. I'm telling you, he looks for weak targets.

I'm not saying nurtured sexual intimacy is the only ingredient to a strong marriage.  I won't even go so far as to say it is the cornerstone (Jesus gets that real estate).

I know full well, though, that there is something powerfully binding that happens when my husband and I make love. And frankly, it angers Satan -- because deep down he knows that a marriage where sex is treasured and protected is a force to be reckoned with. He has a more difficult task on his hands when he goes up against a couple that savors being one with each other.

"Get your hands off my marriage Satan. This is a closed-door meeting, and you were not invited."

2. It shows my kids that sex matters.

Now don't go calling child protective services.  We aren't having sex in front of our kids.  But make no mistake... they know that sex matters in our marriage.

We are discreet with our sexual intimacy, but not so much with our appropriate affection in front of our kids. Our marriage has territory to it that defines us separate from who we are as parents -- and our kids need to know this.

Sadly, so many Christian women have spoken only negatively about sex with the children in their lives, particularly their daughters and nieces.

And you know what happened next? Those daughters and nieces grew up to be wives -- who believed and lived those false tapes as if they were truth. And then they perpetuated the cycle with their own daughters and nieces.

So what are we left with?  A bunch of husbands who want to have sex and a bunch of wives who think it is disgusting and dirty -- and to be avoided at all costs.

If this is your story, I implore you to break this generational epidemic and start reclaiming sexual ground.  You owe it not only to your marriage, but also to your children as well -- that they grow up with an accurate godly perspective on sexual intimacy.

3. It is physical re-affirmation of my wedding vows.

Honestly, my husband and I fight at times.  We occasionally have found each other's "one remaining nerve" and proceeded to traipse right across it.  Marriage is hard -- not "scooping manure all day" hard, but probably a close second at times.  But I love this man.  And he loves me.

Several years ago, we stood before God and the people who know us best and we chose a life together.   When we make love, we are saying to each other once again, "I still choose you.  No matter what, I still choose you."  There is something profound about that.

Is it the only way to say I still choose you?  Well, heavens no.  But it is significant enough that God saw the need to specifically tell married couples to do it often.  Maybe He is on to something, seeing how He is God and all.

Yeah, you could re-affirm your vows with some big shindig, complete with another cake and your crazy uncle doing the Macarena.

...or you could just have lots of mind-blowing sex.  You choose.

4. It's free.

Okay, I admit it.  I'm not quite the coupon queen one would imagine.  Nor do I scour the ads for those "buy one, get one free" sales.  Even so, I appreciate something that is incredibly entertaining and at the same time completely free.  Sex is some of the best entertainment around. Game on.

5. It's a great stress reliever.

Call me crazy, but I don't think there is anything better to relieve stress than an orgasm with the man I love.  Sure, I like a hot bath every now and then.  Or even a massage if I've got the cash and time. And certainly more than a few overpriced lattes have gotten me through some particularly challenging moments.

But sex? Now there's something clever the Creator came up with. I can't quite put my finger on the why, but sex definitely improves my outlook if I'm feeling overwhelmed with life.  Suffice to say, I need a lot of sex to get me through.

So there you have it... 5 Reasons I Like Sex.  I've come clean.  My story is out (and I didn't even have to go to a confession booth or anything like that, thank God.)

How about you?!  Tell me some reasons you like sex with your beloved.  I don't want to be privy to all the details, mind you.

But PLEASSEE.... won't some other Christian wives champion this cause with me?!   I know you're out there.  You just need to confess.

Copyright 2011, Julie Sibert, Intimacy in Marriage Blog.

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May 10th, 2011 by